Bite Me – a Valentine’s Day rant

Bite Me
Bite Me

Ah, Valentine’s Day. Chocolate in boxes, roses in bouquets, and love in the air. How sweet it is! At least, that’s how it’s supposed to be… I’m just going to come right out and say it, I’m not a big fan of Valentine’s Day. Don’t get me wrong, I love the sentiment! Taking a moment to say “I love you” to those nearest and dearest is definitely something I can get on board with… but looking around, I don’t see very much of that.

Instead I see boxes of chocolates flying off the shelves, greeting cards that will say your sweet-nothings for you, and jewelry commercials spreading like wildfire. Of all the holidays, I think Valentine’s Day has become the most commercialized, and the most Hallmark of them all… since when did love become quantifiable by money? There is so much pressure to participate in all the spending, it leads to people feeling obligated, and later hurt or let down when those obligations are not met. According to the National Retail Federation, American’s were estimated to spend around $17.5 billion on Valentine’s Day last year alone, and that guys spend on average over $150 a piece (the message being, if your man doesn’t shell out he clearly doesn’t care about you). My question in all of this is… where is the love?

Don't Go Breakin My Heart
Don’t Go Breakin’ My Heart

To me, love is something genuine. It’s sincere, and intense, and often spontaneous. I don’t want you to tell me you love me because it’s Valentine’s Day, or because you read it off a Hallmark card… I want you to tell me when you feel it, when you mean it, when it’s real. Tell me because you want to tell me, not because you’re supposed to tell me.

So don’t buy me chocolates (unless you want to, of course)… just be yourself, because that’s who I’m in love with the other 364 days of the year.

valentines day, someecards
“There’s no one else I’d rather spend this annual obligation with.” – someecards

That said, if you do feel it, say it. If you do mean it, by all means, tell me. The idea of Valentine’s Day is wonderful, it’s only the mass-market reality of it that I find unappealing. I will not buy you a pair of heart-shaped cuff links you will never, ever wear… but I will tell you that I love you. That I think about you, and grin stupidly throughout my day whenever you’re on my mind. I will let you know how much I miss you when you’re not around, how much I appreciate all the things you do, and if you’re lucky, I might even make you some cookies.

I Carry Your Heart
“I carry your heart with me (I carry it in my heart)” – ee.cummings

Please excuse the Scrooge in me (bah, humbug!). My opinions are my own, and I mean no offense to anyone enjoying this love-bird holiday. I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments below – how do you feel about Valentine’s Day? Do you celebrate it, and if so, what makes it special for you?

And to all my friends, family, and readers, I won’t be buying you chocolates… but I do love you, and appreciate you, and grin stupidly in public when I think of you. And I did make you cookies.*

Happy Valentine’s Day!

*I’m afraid I won’t be sharing a recipe this time, but any classic sugar cookies will do, along with your favorite icing or buttercream. I added a dash of cinnamon to mine, just to warm things up a little – mmm!

, , , , , , , , , ,

Still hungry? Try these:

9 Responses to Bite Me – a Valentine’s Day rant

  1. Foodie Stuntman February 14, 2013 at 3:23 pm #

    I’ll message you on facebook privately but I wrote the following this past Tuesday on my other facebook page:

    Don’t forget! This Thursday is Valentine’s Day…or early Christmas for the Hallmark Corporation, florists, confectioners and restauranteurs. After all, don’t we all want to pay $150 for a dozen roses that would normally be $12.99; buy some candy that will come back to bite us guys in the ass when our significant other asks “do I look fat?” in three weeks; and hearing the conversation of the couple three tables over because you’re packed in like sardines at the local fine dining establishment?

    Sounds romantic, eh?

    In other words, I pretty much agree with you.

    • Willow February 14, 2013 at 3:51 pm #

      Thanks for sharing, Foodie – the restaurant scene is definitely a little less than romantic!

  2. Mary Palumbo Collings February 14, 2013 at 3:49 pm #

    I agree with you completely. Love all the cute heart stuff and decorations, but we don’t get caught up in all that obligatory Jewelry , flowers hoopla… Though my hubby bought me a beautiful new Espaliered Apple tree the other day in lieu of getting on that Valentine’s Day bandwagon… Have a happy day

    • Willow February 14, 2013 at 3:52 pm #

      Thanks, Mary – and I think your husband just won the award of best Valentine’s gift ever! ;)

  3. shannon weber February 14, 2013 at 9:03 pm #

    not scroogy! very honesty, and to the point. I told Mr. Table just this morning (after he texted me a little upset because he couldn’t get flowers delivered today) that i thought last minute flowers shouldn’t be something you felt he “had” to do because everyone else was doing it, or because the women at his work were pressuring him into it. Thing is, i’d rather have flowers for no reason on a day where he just felt like he wanted to send them, and that’s the truth. Besides, he already got me my gift a few weeks ago at the mere mention of me wanting it: a juicer. And he did it because he knew i wanted it. you’re right; it’s fun to decorate and have cute things on today, but it shouldn’t feel like such an obligation. happy valentine’s day to you, Willow (and i’m saying that because i want to. :)

  4. Elana @ The Inventive Vegetarian February 15, 2013 at 6:34 am #

    I’m totally with you on this. If anything, telling someone how much you care will mean more on any other day of the year because Hallmark didn’t tell you to. I like the idea behind Valentine’s day, just not the corporate execution of it.

  5. grace February 15, 2013 at 11:36 am #

    right on. :)

  6. Caroline - All That I'm Eating February 15, 2013 at 1:16 pm #

    I know what you mean, it’s about taking time out with a loved one not showering them in gifts.

  7. Sunday Morning Banana Pancakes February 19, 2013 at 5:09 pm #

    Justin and I feel exactly the same way as you about Vday- since we have been together I have always told others that we love each other and show each other we love one another every day of the year :) We stay home and cook dinner together and bust open a bottle of champagne or Wine- Justin will occasionally buy me flowers but I would rather have flowers on random days than Vday…no cards- except a homemade one I gave him years ago! xo

Leave a Reply

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

Read previous post:
The Wonderful World of Oats! (FAK Friday)

Old-Fashioned Rolled OatsOats are a cereal grain, which, like many now prevalent crops, began as a weed. Early Greeks and Romans used...